“I’m looking for baggage that goes with mine.” ~ Mimi Marquez

The rock musical RENT was the first piece of art that influenced my life in a major way. I was obsessed with the show as a teenager. Through the years my love of the show has remained and my perception of the wisdom in Jonathan Larson’s lyrics has morphed and evolved.

In the show Mimi Margquez is an exotic dancer, junkie, HIV postive 19 year old in and out of love with the rock and roll guitarist Roger Davis. Their relationship is a dynamic mix of chaos and cataclysmic personal growth. Early on Mimi says “I’m looking for baggage that goes with mine.”

This line became an anthem for me in my late teens and early twenties. I was looking for friends, lovers, and communities that “got it,” that had been through recovery or something similarly difficult and intense. It wasn’t hard to find people with matching baggage, but it almost always led to more suffering.

I found that many of the people that had similar baggage wanted to hold onto it and unconsciously (or consciously) glorify their past and current suffering. I noticed a tendency for the suffering, the disorders, the addiction, the recovery, the anxiety, the overworking, or the depression to become the core part of their identity.

I didn’t want that. I wanted growth. I wanted liberation.

I wanted to be informed by my past, but not defined by it. 

It turns out that the baggage that goes best with mine isn’t an exact match or part of a set, but a complimentary piece. The baggage that I’m carrying and looking for isn’t the issues, the problems, or the struggles, it’s the lessons, the beliefs, and the clarity that I’ve found along the way.

The baggage is my bag of magic tricks, not loads of crap holding me down and back. 

This shift in my perception was a game changer. I began to see myself, my friends, my relationships, and the world differently. Over time various people and situations no longer fit in my life and thus fell away or were cut out or burned off as I moved on. It wasn’t always easy, but it was good.

We have a choice in how we see our past and we have a choice in how we create our present and our future.

Choose wisely. Curate a life that feels like an expression of your best self. 

Take time to get to know your current self.

Take time to reflect on your past self with compassion.

Take time to evolve into your future self. Go all in.

Try this journal exercise: 

Write down these questions and them answer them without editing yourself.

• Where have you been?
• Where are you now?
• Where are you going?
• How do you need to think, act and feel to live the life that you are dreaming of?

Now, I want to hear from you:

What baggage are you carrying around that you are ready to let go of?

What baggage are you proudly carrying like this seasons hottest accessory?

Leave a comment below.

I would love to get an inspiring conversation going on the blog. Perhaps it can start with you!

As always, if you found this essay helpful, please share.

It means the world to me and more readers = more opportunities for me to continue writing and working on new projects and experiences to share with you. (PS a weekly podcast is coming soon!)

Much love,

Katie